A house hunting we will go.
2006-01-30
Conversation with "Your Move" estate agent employee:
Dickweed: Hey! that accent isn't from here, where are you from?
Me: Canada
Dickweed: Ho ho, hey! Good thing I asked, I was gonna say American.
Me: yeah, good thing.
Dickweed: Cause Canadians don't like to be mistaken for Americans do they?
Me: not really.
Dickweed: Why is that?
Me: Because Canada is a different country. It would be like calling you an American.
Dickweed: But I'm not from America, am I?
Me: exactly.
[pause]
Dickweed: You sure get a lot more for your money when buying a house in America don't you?
So to say it didn't get off to a glorious start would be a slight understatement. Kate and I had looked around the city and had already decided we wanted to live in Sherwood (a trendy, up and coming neighbourhood in Nottingham) so we asked him specifically for places IN SHERWOOD. He made an appointment for one in Basford which he described as "like Sherwood, but closer to the tram line." He forgot to mention that Basford is a desolate, yob filled stinkhole. We spoke to Pete afterwards and he said "Basford? I wouldn't let my dog live there". That seemed apt.
The halfwit (the estate agent, not Pete) just called me and had the nerve to ask me what we thought of it. "We fucking hated it." I said. He laughed and said "fair enough, does that mean Basford is out, then?". Yeah, you could probably say that.
REOs (Recent English Observations):
- The limeys call peanuts with the shells on "Monkey Nuts". This is probably my favourite REO yet. I was gobsmacked (See REO 2) when I saw a bag of unsalted monkey nuts on the shelf. It makes me laugh typing it right now. I bought them, obviously. not bad.
- "Gobsmacked".
adjective Definition: flabbergasted, astounded, shocked; also written gob-smacked Etymology: from gob `mouth' + smacked `clapping hand over in surprise'
EDIT: -- here is the proof:
This one is a bit of cheat actually, because I heard this before I crossed the pond, but I couldn't think of any other REOs for this week, what are ya gonna do?